I was a sophomore in college, working as a host at a restaurant downtown. This older woman walks up to my host stand and says, “Could you please call me a taxi?”

I couldn’t resist. She was Bert and I was Ernie. “You’re a taxi,” I said. I’m sure I was grinning like the proverbial idiot.

She gives me this funny look and then says, “I’m sorry. I’m deaf, so I can’t use the phone. Could you please call me a taxi?” fucking genius.